Masturbation is one of those things that most people do during their lives, yet it remains a taboo topic, and I imagine probably will do for a very long time.
That means working out the best way to masturbate either involves a whole lot of experimentation, or reading articles like this one.
Despite that fact that most people probably do it the same way, there are actually many different techniques that can seriously ramp up the pleasure and intensity.
So in this article, you’ll find out how to do the basics, followed by more advanced techniques for those looking for new and exciting ways to do it.
You’ll also discover how you can use masturbation to build your sexual endurance. By learning to control your arousal, you’ll be able to last longer when you have sex. Bonus!
Basic masturbation techniques
The one-handed technique
To do the basic technique, grip your penis lightly in your hand, with your fingers underneath and thumb on top.
Then all you need to do is move your hand up and down the shaft in a constant rhythm.
Unless you use lubricant, you might find the same area of skin stays in your grip as you move your hand up and down the shaft, and that’s fine.
It can feel very different depending on how fast you go, the rhythm you choose, how hard you grip and whether you squeeze more or less at different points.
There isn’t really a right or wrong way to do it, so experiment with different finger positions, speeds and pressures to find out what works best for you.
If you like, you can pull your foreskin back and include the penis head in the up and down movement. If you find the exposed head too sensitive though, try using some lubricant.
Use both hands
Although it’s tempting to always use your strong hand to masturbate, involving your other hand can increase your pleasure. Try these ideas:
Sometimes only use your other hand when masturbating.
Try using both hands at the same time. If you can fit them side by side on your shaft, lucky you and your future partner! If like most mortal men you can’t though, try squeezing your penis between your palms and experimenting with a stroking action.
Use one hand to move up and down the shaft, while the other plays with the penis head. Try doing a gentle circular motion with the palm.
Don’t leave your balls hanging
Remember the last time you got hit hard in your balls and collapsed to the floor in nauseating agony? Yep, they are very, very sensitive…
Gently pull on them with your other hand while masturbating.
Caress them slowly to find spots that feel good.
Simply hold them gently in a light grip with the other hand.
There’s also an important health reason to get to know how your testicles feel. If you know what they feel like normally, you’ll be quicker to spot any unusual lumps or growths – something you should keep a check on during your life.
Find your other erogenous zones
It’s a popular belief that only women have multiple erogenous zones. And while it’s true that they do have more sensitive areas than men, your body is still more sensitive than you might think.
Try slowly caressing the inside of your thighs and your stomach. Some men even find their nipples are very sensitive, so try touching and stroking them to see how it feels.
And if there’s anywhere else on your body that feels good to touch, enjoy exploring the different sensations that arise.
Experiment with different positions
Changing position from time to time when you masturbate can also give different sensations. Try these:
If you always sit, try lying down, kneeling or standing instead.
If you always keep your body still while stroking your penis, try keeping your hand still and thrusting into it with your body.
Lie on your front on the bed, with your penis in one hand underneath your body. Arrange some pillows under you, and then thrust into your hand.
Sex toys for a more realistic experience
Try a Fleshlight realistic vagina
There are many companies that make them, but our favorite is Fleshlight. They are made from a silky soft silicon material, with contours and ribs that stimulate you in mind-blowing ways.
The model we particularly recommend is the stamina training unit. It’s made to be especially stimulating, and comes with a helpful booklet explaining how you can use it to increase your sexual stamina.
The slippery joys of lubricant
For the same reason you might use a realistic vagina for masturbation, lubricant can also boost the pleasure factor, and help get you one step closer to the sensations arising during sex.
Whether you’re using a masturbation toy or just your hands, lubricant adds an extra element of pleasure. It also helps prevent friction – especially on the more sensitive penis head.
You can find lubricant in most pharmacies, supermarkets, sex shops and online stores. If you can’t, it’s fine to use a non-chemical, gentle moisturizer.
Cock rings are perhaps one of the simplest sex toys to try out, and can have surprising effects.
You can find simple rings that sit around the base of your penis, some with a double ring that fits around your penis and balls. And there are vibrating versions which will literally give you an added buzz during masturbation.
They can help you keep a stronger erection for longer and increase your stimulation. And depending on the type, can also help stimulate your partner during sex.
Advanced masturbation techniques
The male G-spot
The male G-spot is an area which can be extremely sensitive to touch, so stimulating it the right way can lead to very intense orgasms.
If you’re relatively new to masturbation, finding out where your G-spot is located might be a bit of a surprise.
It’s very well hidden away inside your body – specifically inside the prostate gland, about the size of a large nut, and under your bladder.
So the only way to reach it properly is through the back door. And even then, many men won’t be able to reach it anyway because of it’s awkward position. But if you can’t, there’s the option to use a prostate massager.
There’s also a technique to stimulate your G-spot externally – massaging the perineum. That’s the soft, padded skin between your balls and anus. It’s a sensitive area to touch, and if you massage it and push inwards, you might be able to stimulate your G-spot.
It’s not the same as directly touching it, but you might find it gives you an idea of what the fuss is all about in a way that’s a bit more accessible.
A word of advice – if you do want to try and stimulate yourself internally, do so with trimmed nails, clean fingers, plenty of lube and a gentle touch. Find a position where you can relax and explore yourself slowly.
Porn or imagination and fantasy?
Access to porn has never been easier, thanks to modern devices and the open nature of the internet. But is it good to always watch it when masturbating?
It’s a question which sparks fierce debate in the sex advice world, with strong arguments for and against it.
Some people argue that it presents an unrealistic image of what sex is really like. And can even lead to men having problems like erectile dysfunction when real life sex doesn’t quite live up to their expectations.
My advice is not to become dependent on it to get turned on, and don’t watch it every time you masturbate. It’s also a good idea to watch erotic videos, rather than the hardcore stuff you might never do with your partner.
And even better, try just using your imagination and fantasizing instead. Experiment and see how much pleasure you can create using nothing but your own body and mind.
Edging – riding the wave of orgasmic arousal
Edging is all about extending how long you masturbate for and building up to a more intense climax.
The idea is to repeatedly get close to orgasm but not actually allow yourself to finish, instead carefully reducing how much pleasure you experience for a while.
It’s similar to the stop and start technique (see below) and can also be used to help develop your sexual stamina. But whereas that technique involves stopping, edging is more about keeping going by ‘surfing’ the wave of arousal.
The simple way is to masturbate normally until you get close to climax, and then slow right down so you don’t actually ejaculate. By varying your speed, pressure and rhythm, you can learn to control your arousal.
In time you can learn to maintain a high level of arousal when masturbating, meaning optimum pleasure for the longest possible time. And of course, you’ll have a much more intense orgasm when you finally allow yourself to climax.
Increase your sexual stamina
Some men get into the habit of masturbating as quickly as possible. It’s understandable, because doing it quickly feels great, and it reduces the chance of someone catching you.
While it’s fine to have a quickie sometimes, you don’t want to condition yourself to always finish in lightning speed when you have sex too.
The main way to avoid this happening is to simply take it slower, relax and enjoy your masturbation time rather than rushing it.
Let’s also take a look at 2 specific techniques you can practice to build your sexual stamina.
The stop and start method
A simple technique for developing better control is the stop and start method. You can practice this if you usually finish in just a few minutes, or even if you last longer but want to increase your time.
The simple version is that you set yourself a time (10-20 minutes is good) and don’t allow yourself to ejaculate until that time is up.
Every time you feel like you’re about to orgasm, stop and do nothing for 30 seconds, and then carry on. You might need to stop several times before reaching your target time, and that’s fine. You’ll get better with practice.
This is a great way to masturbate for 2 reasons: you’re working on a useful skill for sex, and pretty much guaranteed a more powerful orgasm when you finally let yourself finish.
Breathe and relax
Breathing slowly and deeply, while keeping your body relaxed, is a good habit to get into when masturbating.
The reason being that when you have sex with a partner, tensing your body and breathing fast are signs that you’re very aroused. And the more aroused you are, the sooner you’ll orgasm.
So when you masturbate, try to keep your body relaxed, and focus on your breathing at least some of the time. Breathe in slowly for the count of 4, hold it for 2 seconds, then breathe out for 4 seconds. Repeat that rhythm for a few minutes and see if it helps you feel more in control.
The final word
The key to finding the best way to masturbate is to experiment and find out what really works for you. Try to be open-minded, but if there are things that just don’t appeal or do it for you, don’t worry about it.
And there are two ideas in this article that I recommend above all others. Firstly, take your time when you masturbate – don’t rush it.
Secondly, whether it’s purely for pleasure or for working on your sexual stamina, I highly recommend trying a fleshlight realistic vagina.